I’m gonna lead off by recognizing the Team Canada Blue Jays.  They have the weight of a nation on their shoulders. And while they’re in last place in a division, they’re in first place in the hearts of a nation.  A silly nation of poutine-eating, syrup-swilling flappy heads.  But a nation nonetheless that sits on America’s head.  Also, they won.  As did the Dodgers (unsurprisingly). The Rockies put up a huge number and beat the Braves. The Indians and the Twins got rained out. The Cubs beat the BIG RED MACHINE. The Red Sox beat the Cardinals. And the Astros have won two games in a row over the battling D-backs.

In other sports, Mayweather and McGregor agree to lighter gloves so Floyd can pepper his head up even faster. Nature Boy has some serious organ problems. And Chik-Fil-A surprises some people by announcing they will not open stadium venues on Sunday. Nobody in the south is the least bit shocked about this, as its been their company policy for over 70 years. And the revenue lost from their stadium location (a stadium that resembles a crunchwrap supreme by the way) pales in comparison the the revenue lost from their mall locations through the holidays. The decision was based on the morality of the owners and their desire for their employees to have at least one consistent days  week off to spend with their families. And I daresay it probably has a net positive effect on their bottom line when all is said and done.  Bravo.

I can’t think of something else sports-wise I may have missed. But I’m sure someone will remind me in the comments section after…the links!

Maury statue

In a shocking turn of events, the Virginia Democrat Governor encouraged all cities in the Commonwealth to tear down their confederate monuments and put them in museums.  I guess he had to say something after his false statements about a cache of weapons stored in Charlottesville by one group of assholes last weekend was refuted by the state police. But I don’t know how smart it is, calling for the removal of memorials that bring in a lot of tourist dollars and are a source of pride by the citizens of the Commonwealth for their architectural beauty and for their cultural significance.  In other words, this will not go over well.*

*Addendum: if they try to tear down anything on Monument Avenue, I humbly request a place to stay in Richmond that week since I will be there prepared to chain myself to one of them. This erasure of history to placate a mob the left has deliberately worked up into a frenzy needs to stop somewhere. And if I need to chain myself to the Matthew Fontaine Maury statue to help facilitate that, I’m seriously willing to do so.

NPR is preparing the left and the establishment right for disappointment regarding the Mueller investigation into Russian election interference. Only time will tell. But it can’t be comforting to those supporting the witch hunt to know that the lead FBI counterintelligence agent on the case has decided to step away from it.  Maybe its because he was a lead agent on the Clinton email investigation and isn’t too happy about the way that dog and pony show was handled by Comey and Lynch. Maybe its something else. I guess we won’t know until they wrap up…which could be any time they decide to stop investigating whatever they feel like investigating.  You know, because its open-ended and they can go wherever it leads them.

Speaking of Russia, this would be the biggest story of the day in a sane world. (No teasers!)

Alternative headline: No Shit. Seriously, this is the worst idea to come out of a California company since the Anakin Skywalker conception story.

::cough::BULLSHIT::cough:: I mean, they can say that. But we know they don’t really mean that.

Hope Hicks

The White House has a new communications director. Read about her here. Or just look at the pics, ya perverts.

Yeah, I hate em too. But this is a good song.

Alright, friends. Make today the best day you’ve had so far this week. That’s what I’m gonna try to do.